Monday 30 March 2009

The Ballad of Bromley Jobcentre Plus


Bromley Jobcentre, how I shan't miss thee,
Bromley Jobcentre, thank Christ you are history
For now the holy grail has come my way
At last, a journalism job that doth pay
We've shared some good times, you and I, you and I
So as I depart thee, I'll try not to cry
Your fat-bellied workers who never pick up the phone
God knows, when they leave work, they go home alone
How I'll miss their pimples, their wrinkles, their scowls
Their over-done make-up laid on with trowels
Bromley Jobcentre, I shan't miss thee, oh no, no indeed
As I leave your cheap surrounds, my heart it don't bleed
But I shall not forsake thee, oh no, no, not I
I will keep my claims booklet eternally close by
For in these hard times one can't be too sure
Permanent employment it just ain't for sure
And my fellow spongers, my chavtastic friends
Wave goodbye with your fag, as our journey now ends.
Bromley Jobcentre, I shan't miss thee,
Thank Christ you are history
For now the holy grail has come my way
At last, a journalism job that doth pay.

For musos...


A new competition to find the best in unsigned talent...

http://www.itchylondon.co.uk/article.cfm/11/39/6788/London-City-Guide/article/The-Peoples-Music-Awards

Copy writing project No. 1





Lucky enough to write the copy for a very talented photographer, Laura Beveridge. Check it! (and her sensitive portrait pics) online:

http://www.laurabeveridge.com/about.htm

Photographs copyright of Laura Beveridge Photography 2009©

For pre-train feasting...


Eat at The Phoenix and catch the late train...

http://www.itchylondon.co.uk/article.cfm/11/41/6713/London-City-Guide/article/The-Phoenix-SW1

For hip hop heads...

Laughably biased depiction of legendary rhymer B.I.G...

http://www.itchybath.co.uk/article.cfm?id=6583&cityid=1§ion=35

For dim sum addicts...

Less is not more. More is more.

http://www.itchylondon.co.uk/review.cfm/11/208821/London-City-Guide/review/New-World

A perfect place to while away the weekend...

A beautiful West London pub serving up mammoth roasts...

http://www.itchylondon.co.uk/review.cfm/11/208982/London-City-Guide/review/Paradise-By-Way-of-Kensal-Green

For lovers of Italian food...

Delicious Italian grub on the cheap and in sexy surrounds...

http://www.itchylondon.co.uk/review.cfm/11/209009/London-City-Guide/review/Princi

For the brave at heart and style conscious...


A terrifying way of acquiring new garms...

http://www.itchylondon.co.uk/article.cfm/11/44/6779/London-City-Guide/article/Swishing-or-Squishing

For chocolate lovers...


Review of scrumptious hot chocolate and macaroons...

http://www.itchylondon.co.uk/article.cfm/11/41/6782/London-City-Guide/article/Apostrophe